Turn on the TV and you’re more likely to see characters talking about or even enjoying pleasure through the backdoor. “Girls,” “The Mindy Project,” and Sex and the City” have all featured scenes with people talking about or enjoying anal sex. It’s hard to imagine there was once a time writers couldn’t even say the word pregnant on “I Love Lucy.” 

The rules are much looser nowadays, meaning more people are talking and learning about sexual taboos. And those taboos… are becoming more mainstream. You may be surprised (or already in the know) that one in three heterosexual women have tried anal sex at some point. The study dives deeper and finds that women in their 20s with no religious affiliation and higher levels of income and education are the most likely to try anal. 

While it’s still up in the air about why more women are trying or admitting to trying anal sex, the data is clear. More people are interested in exploring a new type of sexual pleasure and want to see if they can find backdoor bliss. 

Here are a few first-time pointers and toys that you should try when exploring.

First-Time Tips

If you’re nervous about trying something new, we have you covered! Check out a full blog with tips from our sexpert or look at the pointers below before you check out new territory.


Your partner may have been asking for a while or you are just curious about it. The biggest tip we can give you is to communicate before trying anything new in the bedroom. Get on the same page and talk about a safe word to use if one of you begins to feel uncomfortable. 


Preparation is key to a fun and relaxing experience. An essential ingredient for a good time: silicone-based lubricant that doesn’t absorb quickly into the skin. Pure Pleasure is a must for anal sex because unlike the vagina, the anus does not self-lubricate. Still nervous? Soothe your mind and your behind with a soothing comfort gel that has a relaxing, non-numbing formula. 

Take your Time

Foreplay is always important, but especially now. Start with gentle touches and kisses and work your way downtown. Communication doesn’t stop when the fun starts. Keep talking and making sure you’re both comfortable. It may take a minute or two to get used to the new sensations. Embrace slow movements and enjoy!

Practice Good Hygiene

Wash up before and after anal sex. Also, never go from anal to vaginal sex as this could spread bacteria and lead to unwanted infections.

Toys to Try

Toys are a popular way to ease into anal sex. In a study, researchers found more than half of those who tried anal sex used toys. Let’s look at some toys you can add to your collection.

Back 9

This flexible silicone vibrator is always up to par with a series of six graduated beads that let you indulge while teeing up for the ultimate ace. The single-button control allows to easily change between three vibrating speeds and six pulsing patterns. Whether you’re a novice or expert, this is a great toy that’s soft, flexible, and easy to handle.


Cast a Spell with Mesmerize, an erotic anal massager with seven speeds and pulsing patterns. This silky, silicone vibrator has a tapered, flexible shaft designed to move with your body. Plus, the flared base allows for easy insertion and removal.

Wild Wild West

Saddle up for the ride of your life with Wild Wild West, a western-inspired triple-stimulator toy. Turn on the air pressure for clitoral stimulation, the vibration for vaginal stimulation or the mini teaser for anal fun one at a time, or try all three at the same time for a wild ride. Wrangle all new sensations with 30 different functions. 

Now you’re ready to take a walk on the wild side and explore new sensations and pleasure.

Tori Tromblay

Tori Tromblay

Special Projects Producer
Tori Tromblay (she/her/hers) is a book enthuisiast, cat lover, and Cincinnati native. She graduated from Ohio University with a degree in journalism. After traveling to New York, D.C., London, and Tulsa, she settled back home, where she lives with her husband and two cats. She has worked for Pure Romance for two years and loves to learn and teach about sex education.